Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Not Getting Better, May 2013

Life did not get better for us this month. Today we got worse news about Doris' cancer but she did not lose hope, see below:
Date: Tuesday, May 7, 2013
Dear friends,

My surgery on April 30 was successful. Today I received the initial pathology report. News is not good.

First it is metastatic cancer. Second, it looks like the cancer cells have "changed" from the original. Third, it appears to be aggressive.

Well, what about good news then? First, the tumor is now removed from surgery. Second, the doctor recommends an oral chemotherapy, which allows for better quality of life at least for now. [Frankly speaking I prayed hard not to go through chemotherapy again!] Third, God is still my ultimate doctor. I promise myself not to lose hope that He can always heal – even Lazarus was raised from the dead after the “long delay.” God can glorify Himself in whatever way He pleases.

The verse from 1 Cor chapter 1: V9 Indeed, we felt we had received the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead. 10 He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us again. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us, 11 as you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many.” So I would need your prayers to carry me through.

I finished grading papers for this semester yesterday so that I would be ready to receive the news today. After searching on the web about metastatic cancer, I find this quote that I like. “If the fear of cancer keeps you from moving forward, enjoying life, being with loved ones, laughing, then the cancer won, even if it never comes back. But if you reclaim your life, then even if the cancer comes back, it didn't win, because YOU, the PERSON, survived.” Lisa Weissmann, M.D.

So I decide to move forward, please pray for wisdom to learn how to LIVE (how to reorganize my life and reset my priorities). This Sunday I am going to speak at a church on Mother’s Day and I will still go to the single-parent retreat next week. Pray for God’s presence and may He use me as an instrument. I treasure these opportunities even more – They are God's gifts to give me meaning and reason to live!

I am enclosing some of my journal notes if you want to read the "full version" of my experience.

Blessings,

Doris


May 25th letter:
On Thursday I received the final pathology report. The cancer is indeed recurrence of the past one. I am thankful that it was not HER2 requiring an expensive target chemotherapy with bad effects on the heart. Instead I will begin oral chemotherapy beginning next Monday.

1) Please pray that the Lord will use the oral chemotherapy to kill cancer cells (there is no guarantee) and that the side effects will be minimal and tolerable. Only God can heal me!

2) Please pray for wisdom to do only the tasks the Lord lead me. I decide I will not go back to the www.goodfightdoris.blogspot.com because I will not be “fighting” against cancer as much. Rather I am focusing on finishing the race. [2 Tim 4: 7 I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.] Someday when the time for departure is near, may the Lord help me pour out my life like a drink offering.

3) Please pray for both Victor and I as we adjust our ministry commitments. May the Lord grant us clear direction responding to His call.

PS I am attaching my journal for those who want to know my learning process for the past 2 weeks.