*Jesus Wept*
Yesterday her sister Marion敏英 came in the morning to care for her and To導英 took over in the afternoon, so Doris saw all her beloved HK sisters before she departed. At noon she rested at club house and at evening the pain overwhelmed her and she contemplated going to emergency but To feared no doctor was present over weekend. An hour later the pain persisted and I asked her if she still wanna go. This time she said no, fearing no treatment there. I massaged her legs with cream for her at her request and she felt relaxed and ready for bed. When she got up she suddenly asked if she should shower, we both said yes just in case she would be hospitalized today, her worst fear.
I adjusted the water to the right temperature for her before she sat on the stool in tub. She drew the curtains and showered and slumped unconscious over sideways within a minute or two. Doris favorite request in the swimming pool was for me to give her a piggy back ride, so I dried her quickly and scooped her in my arms without thinking and rushed her to our sofa. I could never have done that usually for fear of dropping her. She would not dare either. At 921pm To placed a call to police while I did quick work to dress her up at the same time hearung the police reply over the phone that they are on the way. Ma Wan is less than ten minutes walking fron one end to other. The two of us barely managed to slip her favorite pants and shirt on when they knocked on our door seconds earlier.
The paramedics did CPR and revived her to send her to hospital. To went ahead to ambulance while I have to lock up as the police were slow to pick up their things. Just as the ambulance was waiting for me a police downstairs said I have to stay to give my account of events, so they left without me. At 956pm To gave me a call and said doctor wanna asked me if I want to resusticate her, and we both agreed that's not her wish.
I caught a taxi to 人濟and arrived seconds before Marion and Tos husband Chiu. The doctor gave us 1009pm time of her departure and said she barely revived one minute before slipping away. Then 煒成，鄭昌，Grace， Paulina joined us to see her body for last time yesterday. I cried my heart, lungs and soul and everything out so that my chest hurts next day. 鄭and 煒成said prayers for us, we sang amazing grace one verse and all took turns to say goodbye to her.
Again the police said they have to return to scene, so Cheng said ask neighbor Ying Fung to be there. At first I resisted because it was past 1130p but a witness was better. It was five against one, so I hopped on police van and Ying Fung was at my building lobby.
After the report I sent Ying Fung home as I want to be alone with Doris. I slept 3 to 5 am and said good morning to Doris even when she is not here. I will try to do more often. This morn I ate the leftover 石斑 fish, clams and 毛瓜 - all her fave - she could not eat last night and her porridge reserved for today, just to reminisce her. I miss her a lot but God is the best caregiver, so I am comforted.
Praise God who received her the best way possible, at home with hubby, almost in bed, which was her wish, but Marion said that might not be good because we would not know till morning. My wife wanted to leave like my father did, eat chicken rice, shower and pass away in sleep.
Yesterday two worships prayed for Doris and she was blessed to depart on the Lord's Day. Thanks all for prayers, food and love, it's what kept her going. May the Lord richly repay all.
The funeral is tentatively scheduled on June 18 Saturday morning.
Victor Yap
* 耶穌哭了*
昨天早上姐姐敏英來照顧她，下午導英來接替，所以Doris離世前見到了她在香港至愛的姐姐們。中午她在會所休息了一會，到了晚上她感到劇烈的疼痛，很想去急症室，又擔心週日沒有醫生當值。劇痛持續了一個小時，我問她是否仍想去醫院，這次她說不用了，就算到了那裏恐怕也沒有幫助，她要求我用潤膚霜幫她按摩雙腿，覺得輕鬆一點了，便準備上牀休息。她坐起身時，突然問是否可以冲涼，我們都說可以，以防萬一第二天需要入院。這也是她最害怕的。
我為她調好水温，扶她坐在浴缸的凳子上，她拉上浴簾冲身，大概只是一兩分鐘的時間，她突然失去知覺，昏迷跌倒在一旁。記得她游泳的時候最喜歡讓我給她“騎小豬”，我立即幫她抹乾身體，來不及思想便用手臂把她鏟起，抱起她衝到沙發。我從來不會這麼做，因為怕摔到她，她也從來不敢讓我這樣抱起她。
導姐在晚上9:21報了警，當我們聽到警察的回覆，說他們正在趕來我家，我們曉得要快為Dori穿衣。馬灣是一個很小的社區，從一頭走到另外一頭只需要十分鐘， 我們剛剛幫Doris穿上她最喜歡的衣衫和褲子，警察已經到了門口。醫護人員來到時為她做了心肺復甦CPR，讓她恢復知覺，再由救護車送去仁濟醫院。我需要等警員在屋內慢慢收集証物，鎖門之後要達的士去醫院。救護車本來在樓下等着我，但樓下的一位警員說我必須留下來錄口供，救護車就先走了。
晚上9:56分醫院打電話給我，問我是否想要搶救Doris，我們清楚這不是她的意願。我馬上打車到了仁濟醫院，敏英和導英的丈夫超哥也差不多時間趕到。醫生告訴我們，她只短暫甦醒了一分鐘，証實去世的時間是晚上10:09。之後煒成，鄭昌，Grace， Paulina 也趕來了。我哭得撕心裂肺(第二天胸口很痛)，鄭昌、煒成為我們禱告，大家一起唱詩歌“奇異恩典”，每人輪流和她道別。
這時候，警方打來通知我，說他們需要再回現場錄口供，於是鄭昌請鄰居英峰到我家去幫忙。一開始我不願意，因為太晚，已經過了11:30。但有一位証人在場始終好一點，我一個說不過他們五個，五比一，於是我上了警車回到家，英峰已經在樓下大堂等着我。
錄完口供，送走了英峰，我想和Doris單獨在一起。我從凌晨3點睡到5點，起牀時雖然知道她不在，還是對她說了一聲“早安!” 我以後會經常這麼做。心裏懷念着她，我把昨晚她的剩菜 - 石斑、蜆和毛瓜做早餐吃了，這些都是她愛吃的，還有預備她今天喝的粥。我非常掛念她，但神是最好的照顧者，我的心被神安慰了。
感謝讚美神！祂以最好的方式將Doris接去：和丈夫一起在家中，差不多上床睡覺了，這正是她的心願。可是姐姐敏英不覺得睡覺離夢中離是好的，因為這樣的話，我們要到第二天早上才會發現她已經被接走了。我知道我的太太希望像我父親去世時那樣，吃了雞飯、冲凉、在睡夢中離世。
感謝你們的禱告、食物、花和愛，支撑着Doris走完她人生的路，願神親自記念報答大家。
葉福成May 22
Thursday, June 2, 2016
Monday, August 31, 2015
Dear Doris
Dear Doris:
I read your previous email. I was very sorrowful. I was so sad and I don't know how to comfort you. I don't want you to suffer and I don't want you to give up. You have inspired me many times in many ways. I love both you and Victor. I remember first time Victor introduced you to me as his girlfriend. I remember we had enjoyed food together. I remember just hanging out with both of you. Eleanor and I treasured all these memories. We appreciate your teaching when you both came to speak for the RCCCC retreat. I still think your are more interesting to listen to. (Yeah! I know Victor does not like me when I say so.) To be fair to him, I happen to think that Victor is one of the best Chinese preachers I have known.
Thank you for sharing that you are trying the new drug. I am praying for effectiveness of the drug and minimum damages it will cause. Hang in there. You are never far away from God's love. He loves us more than we can ever feel or comprehend. I use this verse in my sermon this morning:
Rom 8:32 He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?
I hope to see you even though I don't know where and when. What a blessing it is to have friends like you and Victor!
Herman and Eleanor
I read your previous email. I was very sorrowful. I was so sad and I don't know how to comfort you. I don't want you to suffer and I don't want you to give up. You have inspired me many times in many ways. I love both you and Victor. I remember first time Victor introduced you to me as his girlfriend. I remember we had enjoyed food together. I remember just hanging out with both of you. Eleanor and I treasured all these memories. We appreciate your teaching when you both came to speak for the RCCCC retreat. I still think your are more interesting to listen to. (Yeah! I know Victor does not like me when I say so.) To be fair to him, I happen to think that Victor is one of the best Chinese preachers I have known.
Thank you for sharing that you are trying the new drug. I am praying for effectiveness of the drug and minimum damages it will cause. Hang in there. You are never far away from God's love. He loves us more than we can ever feel or comprehend. I use this verse in my sermon this morning:
Rom 8:32 He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?
I hope to see you even though I don't know where and when. What a blessing it is to have friends like you and Victor!
Herman and Eleanor
Sunday, August 23, 2015
Thanks, Aug 24
Dear Victor,
Sorry to learn about Doris' cancer has mestasized. My wife and I are remembering you two in our prayer.
Life has been hard for me too because I have not been free from physical problems since arriving in Vancouver. God is teaching me to trust Him and I feel closer to Him more than any time in the past.
I have forwarded your email and the manuscripts to A who will contact you in due time.
In His grace,
AK
Sorry to learn about Doris' cancer has mestasized. My wife and I are remembering you two in our prayer.
Life has been hard for me too because I have not been free from physical problems since arriving in Vancouver. God is teaching me to trust Him and I feel closer to Him more than any time in the past.
I have forwarded your email and the manuscripts to A who will contact you in due time.
In His grace,
AK
Sunday, August 9, 2015
Mestasized, Aug 2015
We received news two days ago Aug 8 from Doris PET CT scan that her cancer is likely mestasized. She has been suffering from a month long ribcage and shoulder pain two months after her two year oral chemotherapy ended in May. Yesterday she had abdominal pain at around 3 pm and went to lie down and sleep while we had a marketplace meeting at home. Pray for her pain, it hurts to see her helpless and in anguish.
Saturday, August 1, 2015
Anniversary, Aug 2015
Yesterday was our anniversary. We bought an overnight package at a popular hotel but the dinner buffet and especially morning breakfast were flat. The noon part was rather ho-hum but we made it up with takeout dinner and cake, enough to spare for our neighbor who dropped by.
Doris had finished her treatment but the pain in the ribcage and shoulder are a concern. We will order tests to see what happens. Please pray for her. We will cancel our trip to USA due her pain.
Besides wife's struggles, not much has changed for me. Last month was a breakthrough because I managed four sermons, three new ones, all by God's grace. I have handed over leadership in a couples fellowship to my other coworkers, so I am glad that we have bought stability to the couples and church as a whole. By the way I will have completed two years fulltime at YF this month. It's been quite a challenging and growing experience.
I seldom check in nowadays because of my busy schedule, but I still hope to write once every two months for now, bye.
Doris had finished her treatment but the pain in the ribcage and shoulder are a concern. We will order tests to see what happens. Please pray for her. We will cancel our trip to USA due her pain.
Besides wife's struggles, not much has changed for me. Last month was a breakthrough because I managed four sermons, three new ones, all by God's grace. I have handed over leadership in a couples fellowship to my other coworkers, so I am glad that we have bought stability to the couples and church as a whole. By the way I will have completed two years fulltime at YF this month. It's been quite a challenging and growing experience.
I seldom check in nowadays because of my busy schedule, but I still hope to write once every two months for now, bye.
Tuesday, June 2, 2015
Shanghai, June 2015
We just came back from six days of holiday in Shanghai two weeks after the end of wife's two-year chemotherapy treatment. It was an enjoyable trip for the two of us. We stayed at Okura and took the mtr or traveled on foot. The biggest surprise was an impromptu one-day trip Hangzhou. On day two we were caught by the rain at the same time I was sneezing all day. The scenes, sights and sounds that amaze us are the museum, 淮海路， 新天地， 恆龍， 外灘 and a lot of things and places. Peace Hotel napkins were perfect. We were very impressed. I could only find a piece of litter on mtr trains through five days.
In Hangzhou we strolled halfway through Westlake before we came to Shangrila and had high tea for RMB$88. We were just glad we were allowed to eat there. Starbucks was everywhere on the lake but the drinks are not as good. It was one of the best places we traveled.
Food was good at 大吉士 and most eateries, including Napoleon cake. Local street Shanghai food is good for a small budget, like four buns for RMB$5, less than 20% of the price at a fancy restaurant.
At the end fo the trip I had finished the 文法聖經 three months after I started, hoorah!
In Hangzhou we strolled halfway through Westlake before we came to Shangrila and had high tea for RMB$88. We were just glad we were allowed to eat there. Starbucks was everywhere on the lake but the drinks are not as good. It was one of the best places we traveled.
Food was good at 大吉士 and most eateries, including Napoleon cake. Local street Shanghai food is good for a small budget, like four buns for RMB$5, less than 20% of the price at a fancy restaurant.
At the end fo the trip I had finished the 文法聖經 three months after I started, hoorah!
文法聖經 Apr 2015
I am hot at work on my grammatical Bible, which is my labor of love and masterpiece to contribute to the world of Bible exposition. I have just finished the New Testament version, but it is hard work, tedious, detailed and taxing. Instead of teaching more students how to look at the verbs (imperatives, indicatives, infinitives, subjunctives and participles) I have worked it into the Chinese Bible. I started in March, so I am two months into the job. The hardest is to edit, and I have lost a few days of editing error.
Praise God, Doris is in the last month of oral chem. The next thing is deciding what to do, stay in Macau or back to HK. We trust God to open doors for her and tell her what to decide, otherwise she would feel uneasy.
It is the end of the year review for many things at work and I have contributed much but much is required. Next week I am heading to Taiwan to do a two hour lecture on expository sermon, but I am not sure how it will be received. I prefer a whole course rather than a short talk.
Praise God, Doris is in the last month of oral chem. The next thing is deciding what to do, stay in Macau or back to HK. We trust God to open doors for her and tell her what to decide, otherwise she would feel uneasy.
It is the end of the year review for many things at work and I have contributed much but much is required. Next week I am heading to Taiwan to do a two hour lecture on expository sermon, but I am not sure how it will be received. I prefer a whole course rather than a short talk.
Wednesday, March 4, 2015
Chinese New Year, Mar 2015
We had a quiet but meaningful new year, slowing down enough to rest and relax. The truth is we did not even go out on the first day. On the second day we went to relatives for dinner. On the third day we ate German pork knuckle at home. I went back to work like most people did next week, Tuesday for us.
Yesterday a student from China visited me with his wife and seven months old daughter. It was heart-wrenching to discover that graduates there make less than $3,000 a month and they have to turn to secular jobs. They left Beijing after seven years to return to Shandong with baby's birth but the living there with the husband's family is harsh with problems adjusting to food and in-laws there. They hope to visit Dongguan where her parents are, and see if they can live there, but living with in-laws is not an option for the young family. It is interesting they think HK has hukou.
What I am most happy about is to finish revising all my old sermons, putting in the Hebrew and Greek structure into its place. That would make the sermons timeless and technical. Now I have two more challenges to revise my preaching notes and record it for my students. The second is to put structures into parsing guides and its Chinese translation and upload it on the net with permission. It's a long story but pastors and seminarians would appreciate it. It is durable for the long haul.
Yesterday a student from China visited me with his wife and seven months old daughter. It was heart-wrenching to discover that graduates there make less than $3,000 a month and they have to turn to secular jobs. They left Beijing after seven years to return to Shandong with baby's birth but the living there with the husband's family is harsh with problems adjusting to food and in-laws there. They hope to visit Dongguan where her parents are, and see if they can live there, but living with in-laws is not an option for the young family. It is interesting they think HK has hukou.
What I am most happy about is to finish revising all my old sermons, putting in the Hebrew and Greek structure into its place. That would make the sermons timeless and technical. Now I have two more challenges to revise my preaching notes and record it for my students. The second is to put structures into parsing guides and its Chinese translation and upload it on the net with permission. It's a long story but pastors and seminarians would appreciate it. It is durable for the long haul.
Friday, January 9, 2015
New Year, Jan 2015
The new year has arrived. As usual, I changed a pair of shoes, few pair of socks and some garments, just like old days. For last year I gave thanks for PTH ministry, Couples Fellowship and my brother's immigration to USA. It's been a long six years and four months since we have arrived in HK and we are pretty much settled here.
The last month has been great for wife. She has been happy for a few weeks, no longer bothered by the cancer she has. We have been to mainland twice in the last month, Panyu and Foshan, and we manage to adjust the mishaps much better than we thought. Once we went to the wrong place and another time we went to an old mall.
I was unhappy when a good friend left his job, but life can be unfair especially to those without clout. For the new year I pray for health, stability and friends. May the Lord look after family and friends.
The last month has been great for wife. She has been happy for a few weeks, no longer bothered by the cancer she has. We have been to mainland twice in the last month, Panyu and Foshan, and we manage to adjust the mishaps much better than we thought. Once we went to the wrong place and another time we went to an old mall.
I was unhappy when a good friend left his job, but life can be unfair especially to those without clout. For the new year I pray for health, stability and friends. May the Lord look after family and friends.
Monday, December 1, 2014
Year's End, Dec 2014
It's terrible, the year is slowly coming to an end so fast. At least I have caught up with my lost usb content, which took me half a year. I have not been a good blogger as well, it seems I blogged every two months nowadays.
Hong Kong is caught up with Occupy Central. Let's pray for protesters, police and the public. There is just no good end to the two opposing sides, the officials and the opposition. It should never have happened in the first place, but the city is so divided politically, financially and emotionally presently.
The last year was some sort of weird closure for my siblings. My brother has passed his permanent resident interview to the States. It is my sister's upcoming case that i fear for.
PTH is stable but there could be a change, which is usual for such a big group. It is more important to encourage and empower the next generation.
Hong Kong is caught up with Occupy Central. Let's pray for protesters, police and the public. There is just no good end to the two opposing sides, the officials and the opposition. It should never have happened in the first place, but the city is so divided politically, financially and emotionally presently.
The last year was some sort of weird closure for my siblings. My brother has passed his permanent resident interview to the States. It is my sister's upcoming case that i fear for.
PTH is stable but there could be a change, which is usual for such a big group. It is more important to encourage and empower the next generation.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)